She trudged forward, her life holding no meaning, no purpose, her happiness holding no value, diminishing painstakingly like a burnt out candle.
Darkness welcomed her like an old friend. It greeted her with open arms and questioned amusingly, “Didn’t like the light that much now did you? I persistently reminded you I’m the better one, the easier escape.” It chuckled knowing the answer all too well. She replied in a dry undertone, her voice sounding like a piano that hadn’t been played since many winters, a little out of tune, mismatched, disaccorded and tightly strained,” It was too bright. The supposed happiness just confidingly hid layers of sorrow underneath. I’d rather shamelessly delve into sorrow rather than pretend to be something I never have and never will be able to become-happy.”
Darkness laughed remorselessly. With maniacal glee swimming in its eyes, it led her gleefully deeper into the cavern of nothingness. The dead lights that pathetically attempted to light the path glimmered, a flicker of recognition passing through their undoubting gaze. She slid deeper and deeper into the cavern, darkness ‘guiding’ her masterfully to lose her way and get lost completely in the maze, be consumed by the black, be devoured by hopelessness, never to find the right direction again.
As she immersed herself completely into the sea of denial, she drowned helplessly and the ice-cold water froze the blood in her veins, the beat in her heart, the logic in her mind and the life in her soul. It drowsed ruthlessly the minuscule flame that had managed to burn with immense struggle inside her.
Darkness stopped abruptly, took a deep breath and grinned fanatically. It had at last reasserted its ‘throne’ in her being.
A cry went up in the shuddering air, and faded to a shrill wailing, a voice bodiless and thin that died, and was swallowed up by the aura that Darkness so profoundly exuded. An overpowering sense of vulnerability hit her firmly like a glass shard sinking deep into her inner self-physical and mental alike. She doubled over and fell on the ground whimpering like a trapped rabbit. The whole world closed around her, like an eyelid and for a moment she saw a blinding flash of light before everything resumed its known dark nature. She was sucked into a tunnel; a place of numbing pressure and silent chaos. Her head was about to explode.
Darkness picked her up, like an apprehensive father nursing its sick child and continued the journey into the hell hole. Her mind hovered in an endless abyss. She was dragged, unconsciously into realms beyond her wildest imagination, into a pit of such depression, even Darkness flinched momentarily.
She reached eventually into the new world, her old world long ago forcefully and with inhuman brutality wiped away from the depths of her deepest memories. She breathed in this new air, even the air tasting dark on her parched tongue, smelling stale and fatal. She found herself shaking uncontrollably. Visceral shock of despair had gone through like an arrow when she stole a quick, petrified glance at to what she had become, or rather what Darkness had made of her and now when she gazed at it, the malevolence in her eyes reflected staunchly around her.
Cover image by Nickendra Manikandan.